Bad News

My classmate and dear friend Henri already gave up from his almost everyday visits to the doctors and tons of medicines to be injected at him and fortunately(spiritually) he died today. It was really a sad thing because I knew he really fought for it and I know that he still wants to live. After all, he is too young to die - he's still 23 years old.

Then I realized that death is unavoidable. If God wants you to be dead right this very minute, he can do that. He can turn your 'style' of death to become horrible and painful or a sweet just-lying-on-the-bed kind. Either way, he still is the one responsible for death to occur. You can't choose when and where to die. You also can't choose what type of 'killing method' will be used upon you so you might as well be ready at all times.

Sometimes, I'm scared of death. Scared in which I don't know what to do if I'm being told by the doctor that I only have 2 days to live. Scared that there's a time limit for me to surpass this cruel world after two days. What will happen to my friends and family after I die? Will a lot of people come to my funeral? Will they cry? Will they remember me even if I'm dead after 10,20,30 years? I don't care. I'm not there anymore to witness.

However, I'm not afraid of talking about death. Some people do. I just don't know why. They say I'm morbid. Morbidly stupid to talk about death and how will I face them and what if I die today and all those thoughts. People hearing those things I say usually punch me and tell me to shut up because it's not a good topic. But why? Death is unavoidable. We all go to that process, except for Rapture when God will take us which is the best thing but why say it's a bad topic? Maybe because, they aren't ready to die yet. They don't want to talk about it because they don't know what to do with themselves when their hour is near.

Well, the thing is, I'm ready to die. And hoping also Henri.

Rest in Peace, Henri.

Paul